Malcolm (Repost)

Several years ago when Bob Eubanks was hosting the CBS version of Card Sharks, he asked a question along the lines did you have something that really embarrassed you.  Eubanks then ad-libbed that there was something HE did that was embarrassing:  a syndicated piece of business called The Diamond Head Game.  I won't go into what that was here (though I will in the future), but he did say that after that fiasco he could not get work for several years.

Every game show host has had that one gig that they would really love to forget.  Recently, we found Alex Trebek's.

Possibly as a favor to his old friend Merrill Heatter (High Rollers) he did a game show called Malcolm.  Yes, the game show was called Malcolm, for it was Malcolm who was the star of the show, Alex the co-host.

Who....or what...Malcolm was, was an animated figure he was the centerpiece of the game.  Malcolm was voiced live off staged, and he was controlled by a computer.

I would not call this horrible.  I have seen worse (see Diamond Head), but this is baaaaad.  Trebek is totally miscast as "Malcolm"'s sidekick, you might say, though he is serviceable when it true gameshow host mode. The credits list someone named Bob Stone as the voice of "Malcolm," and whoever he is, he is a drag on the whole thing.  Snapless, and eventually boring, the character needed a bit more of an edge, but I guess Heatter wanted something more friendly.

Gameplay

Actually, there is the germ of a good game here.  Three contestants and "Malcolm" are answering questions with two-word answers.  Two contestants buzz in...the first person who buzzes in gets to give the first word of the answer and the second person gets the second word in.  10 points to each player for a correct answer and both answers must be right.  If there's a miss, the 3rd player gets to partner with "Malcolm," who always has the right answer (how'd THAT happen?)

50 points wins the game, and there is the "Malcolm's rule"..if any player helps someone win the game, both players return in the next game, regardless of the score.

Bonus Game.

EIght screens containing question categories.  The champion picks the category and answers the question. A right answer reveals a prize.  Answer another question in the same category and the prize is theirs.  The big prize is $10,000, plus the usual array of neat and gag gifts.

The player and Malcolm answer the two-word questions, with Malcolm taking one word, and the player the other.  Malcolm, is always right, of course.

On trick in winning the $10K: before you can get your hands on the cash, you have to win one other prize.

You have 90 seconds

Can this game be saved?



Actually, yes.

As configurated now, Malcolm would work great as a kid's game show.  I hear the new channel The Hub is looking for content, this would work great.  But if you insist that this be an adult show, some changes.

The front game is a good one, no changes there.  It is the bonus where I would add some sort of danger like a LOSE sign or something.  Also, the big change I'd make would be in casting: Trebek is too straight-laced to be doing something like this.  The host position should have a bit of irony to this...the normal gameshow host put in the position of being second-banana to a line-drawing.  I see Malcolm, himself, as sort of a cleaned-up version of Triumph the Insult Dog...wisecracking, leering, loveable, yet annoying.

Final thoughts.

In the end, though, there is no way that Malcolm would ever see the light of day, unless as a kid's show.

Thankfully, Trebek has gone on to better things.

Here, in its excruciating entirety, is the Malcolm pilot.